a guest series, courtesy of a very friendly lawyer
![]()
OH, THE DIVORCES
Being in a band really is like being in a marriage. Relationships between band members are key and, when they get strained, they can kill it off. It’s hard enough keeping it together when you’re just a group of like-minded friends. I have no idea how married couples can function as bandmates without driving each other nuts, so maybe these folks can tell us:
Cities in Dust – Banshees (Siouxsie Sioux and Budgie, 1991 – 2007). Ms. Ballion and Mr. Clarke connected in the middle of the Banshees’ run and kept it together as The Creatures after the first band dissolved.
I Give Up – Quasi (Janet Weiss and Sam Coomes, 1990 – 1995). Divorce didn’t get in Quasi’s way—they’re still a going concern after 23 years. A lot of fun in concert, too, if you get a chance to see them.
Hotel Yorba – White Stripes (Jack and Meg White,1996 – 2000). When I first saw them at the Troubadour Jack and Meg were still pretending to be siblings, although their marriage was already over by that point. All their albums were released after the split, and they kept the band going for another 11 years.
Disappearer – Sonic Youth (Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore,1984 – 2011). They had a 30-year run, but Thurston’s affair ended it.
Intervention – Arcade Fire (Win Butler and Régine Chassagne, 2003 – 2025). Mr. Butler’s infidelities also tanked his marriage, although the band did release an album after the split. It’s a recent development, so it remains to be seen if the lead couple can keep the act together.
Walking in L.A. – Missing Persons (Dale and Terry Bozzio, 1979 – 1986). Dale and Terry met while recording Joe’s Garage with Frank Zappa. They released a couple of successful records but, when Color In Your Life flopped, the tensions were too much to keep the band going. Warren Cuccurullo went on to replace Andy Taylor in Duran Duran for a few albums. Terry played with high profile legends like Mick Jagger and Jeff Beck. Dale reformed Missing Persons a couple of years ago, with The Knack’s Prescott Niles on bass.
True Love – X (Exene and John Doe, 1980 – 1985). X’s two singers were married when the band released their first four (and best) albums. The fifth record, Ain’t Love Grand!, wasn’t the success they hoped for and it led to guitarist Billy Zoom quitting. Exene married Viggo Mortensen for a while, but X soldiered on. After a few fits and starts with Tony Gilkyson as guitarist, Zoom returned, and the band are still recording and performing shows.
Seems So – The Apples in Stereo (Robert Schneider and Hilarie Sidney, 1994 – 2004). The Elephant 6 Collective’s principal act had a married couple for most of its tenure. Hilarie drummed on the first eight records, including two after the divorce. The band is theoretically still active, despite Robert’s academic career in mathematics and countless musical side projects, but they haven’t released a record since 2010’s Travellers in Space and Time.
Gronlandic Edit – Of Montreal (Kevin Barnes and Nina Grøttland, 2003 – 2013). Frontman/songwriter/bandleader Barnes is the man behind this Athens, Georgia art-rock experience and used to record everything himself. But their live performances are a real spectacle, with costumes and stage sets, and the non-musical dance group the Sneakies. Nina played bass for a bit and had a daughter with Barnes. That ended a while ago and Barnes has since come out as non-binary genderqueer, which may or may not have had something to do with the marriage’s end.
Velvet Ring – Big Thief (Adrianne Lenker and Buck Meek, 2015 – 2018). I read a recent interview with the band, in which Adrienne and Buck described themselves as best friends. Although the marriage didn’t last, it was sweet that the pair “couldn’t imagine” not making music together.
Bonus Track: Oh, The Divorces – Tracy Thorn. After 28 years as a couple, Tracy married Ben Watt. That was 17 years ago for the members of Everything But The Girl, who took some time off for side projects and to raise their three kids, then regrouped for another couple of albums. They’re the poster children for bands with couples that manage to remain married, but that’s a different post for another day.
Jonny
































