JC writes…..

I’m thinking that I’m going to wake up feeling a bit lost as all my blogging comrades head home after what I am sure will have proven to be a momentous and unforgettable weekend. I will, hopefully, find the time soon to put up a posting or two with my thoughts and memories but for now want to start the week off with what I think is one of the best-written posts to grace these pages.

It’s a TVV debut for KC who some of you will know as the wonderful new talent to be ‘discovered’ by SWC and Tim over at WYCRA. KC has chosen to dive in at the deepest of ends today without the aid of any safety devices…

An Imaginary Compilation – Coldplay

by KC from When You Can’t Remember Anything

“So how do these Imaginary Compilation Albums work then”?

I am sitting in the kitchen at work talking to SWC and Badger as we wait for the kettle to boil.

“Do you have to wait to be invited to do one or can you just jump in and do it”?

Slowly Badger explains it to me. I learn that you can write one about any band you like, any one at all is fair game.

“I mean some idiot even wrote one about Kanye West last year”, SWC chips in as his teabags leave a trail from cup to bin.

“That was you wasn’t it?” I ask him. He nods sheepishly.

“Are you thinking of writing one then?” he asks me before telling Badger about one that he had started last week at midnight when trying to sleep on the sofa whilst his wife was poorly.

It’s my turn to nod. “I’m going to write one on Coldplay…” there is a little choking noise. It’s Badger and he appears to have a small amount of brown crumbs around his mouth. I think he has just half swallowed and half choked on a Bourborn Cream.

SWC looks at me and is shaking his head, “they will never forgive you” he says. I look at him with confusion. He sighs…“One of the unwritten rules of music blogging; Thou must not write anything nice about Coldplay, Keane, The 1975 or Mumford and Sons and never ever admit to liking them even if you do”.

Well I do like Coldplay, and I like Chris Martin, I think he is a nice guy who is doing what he loves. He has an air about of him of a man who cannot believe his luck. He’s a geeky bloke from Devon who made a few records and then married a Hollywood actress. Last year at the Radio 1 Big Day Out, Chris Martin had 50,000 people eating out of his hands, people of all ages, all sexes, all races, religions and sexuality, and yet from what I can see even the mere suggestion of liking him or his music on various blogs is enough to get sneers of derision. Well to be honest you lot need to get over yourselves.

You know what I have a theory, and I’m telling this to Badger and SWC in the kitchen unaware that four other people are now listening to me. I think secretly most of you out there own something by Coldplay, and I think you play it more regularly than you will ever admit to it (aha, a nod from Badger).

It is far too easy to diss Coldplay, mostly this is just to pass them off as shit, most people who do this have heard two, possibly three songs by them. Well fine that’s your view, but let me tell you this. Chris Martin is more relevant than that chap from The Wedding Present ever has been or ever will be. He writes better lyrics than Morrissey and is a far nicer person. Every album Coldplay have made is better than anything that LCD Soundsystem have ever recorded (and when I say this it’s SWC’s turn to choke, genuinely choke).

Chris Martin has more charisma and stage presence than nearly every other front man or woman that I can think of. Face it indie boy, he is better than you at everything and secretly you know that and that is why you hate him. If you ask me it comes down to a question of what you want from your rockstars.

So I’m tweaking the nose of convention and I’m ripping up the rulebook. Because guys, here comes my ICA on Coldplay and I’m basing it on their first three albums, all of which are great records.

Side One

Trouble – Taken from ‘Parachutes’

This is probably one of those songs that annoys you all. Yet this is a song of gorgeous regret, an apology to someone somewhere – the lyrics show this “I never meant to do you harm”. It’s a powerful song because it is so simple and so easy for everyone to understand and get, and that’s why it is so popular.

Talk – Taken from ‘X&Y’

According to SWC this is the only Coldplay song worth listening to and that is only because it samples something by someone called Kraftwerk. It’s a different kind of Coldplay song entirely, much heavier than their usual standards but still really good.

Til Kingdom Come – Taken from ‘X&Y’

My Dad loves Johnny Cash and this song was written for him (Johnny Cash not my dad) by Coldplay and he never got to record it. I imagine that Cash would have recorded it different but this is a lovely little acoustic track and one that I really like. I especially like the way you get this at the end of the album perfectly contradicting the big sounds of the earlier parts of the album.

In My Place – Taken from ‘A Rush of Blood to the Head’

This is a grower I think, at first people were unsure of it, they were unsure of Coldplay’s progression as a band. But then after a few listens you realise that it is a fantastic pop single. For me it justifies my claim that they have more presence that most of the bands around today.

Low – Taken from ‘X&Y’

I’ll end side one with perhaps the most frantic song that they have ever recorded. I really like the guitars on this but I’m not going to try to describe how they sound. They sound awesome and that should be enough.

Side Two

Don’t Panic – Taken from ‘Parachutes’

I saw Coldplay live a few years back and when they played this the crowd went absolutely bananas for it. It is something of a fans favourite.

Warning Sign – Taken from ‘A Rush of Blood to the Head’

Coldplay are a band that are very much in touch with their emotions which is probably why they get so much stick. Personally I think it works in their favour. The vocals on this are passionate and heartfelt and again it is so simple when Martin goes, “The truth is I miss you”. Lovely.

You’ve Gotta Fight For Your Right To Party – Beastie Boys Cover

This is recorded live somewhere the day after one of the Beastie Boys died. I wasn’t aware of the original song until I heard this. I think the sentiment and the poignancy of this are beautiful and again it is heartfelt and sincere.

Square One – Taken from ‘X&Y’

Another thing about Coldplay and Chris Martin in particular is they have a knack of writing lyrics that affect individual on a massive scale. Thousands have fallen for his songs about love, hope, loss etc and ‘Square one’ is the track that gives them more than all the others with its lyrics asking “Is the anywhere you want to go…?”

Politik – Taken from ‘A Rush of Blood to the Head’

This song opens the second album ‘A Rush of Blood To the Head’ and it is quite an intense song and it happens to be my favourite Coldplay song should I actually need one. It is an exhilarating, driving blast and most bands out there would give anything to record a song anywhere near as good as this.